For this week’s Travel Expert Insider I felt called to share something really personal with you that has made a huge difference in my life in terms of success and happiness, and I believe it can make a huge difference for you too.
Your language, both what you say out loud and what you say in your head, directly impacts your success and your happiness.
One of my self-sabotaging phrases that I have repeated both out loud and in my head is…
“I have to” (or sometimes, “I need to”). I HAVE to get this or that done. I NEED to do this or that. And I would think it or say it in a begrudging way. I need to do these 57 things on my to-do list, oh, woe is me.
This one is a really easy one to flip. Instead of saying “I have to” or “I need to”, say: “I choose to”.
That is much more powerful because it’s the truth. The truth is you choose to.
You choose to pack your kids healthy lunches. You choose to care for your home so that it’s a beautiful place you love to be. You choose to work through your modules in the Travel Expert Marketing Academy so that you can have a thriving travel agency and make a great living. You choose to take exquisite care of your clients. You choose to take exquisite care of your health and well being by getting up early every morning to workout and by stocking your fridge with healthy food. You choose to do not-so-fun marketing stuff like set up and update your tracking spreadsheets, learn Google Analytics, etc. etc. so that you have control over your business and know exactly where to spend your time, energy, and money.
Starting right now today, pay attention to how you talk – to yourself and to others. Each time you catch yourself saying, “I have to” or “I need to”, flip it to “I choose to”.
Another self-sabotaging phrase I’m guilty of saying is…
When people ask how I’m doing, I may say “I’m fine” out loud, but in my head I would think “I’m totally overwhelmed”.
When I started really paying attention to my language, I was shocked at how often I would say or think “I’m overwhelmed”. As most of us know, what we focus our thoughts on becomes our reality. By saying that over and over again in my head, and even out loud sometimes, I was cementing that in, reinforcing that, and as a result, creating MORE overwhelm.
What is the opposite of overwhelm? For me it’s grace, ease, flow, and most of all, feeling like I got enough done. I started using the affirmation… I got the perfect amount done today. So at the end of the day when I’m closing up my computer, I will say… I got the perfect amount done today.
My flip on overwhelm is to simply opt out of it.
I’m no longer participating in overwhelm and busyness. Instead I’m focused on taking high impact action with an attitude of authority.
You’re the authority of your life and you can opt out of overwhelm.
When you catch yourself thinking or feeling overwhelmed, stop, take a breath, and ask yourself “Am I taking high impaction action right now?”
If the answer is no, reassess what you’re doing because maybe whatever you’re doing in that moment is something that doesn’t need to be done. Or maybe you simply need to take a short break.
We tend to focus on minutia that doesn’t matter when we’re feeling tired or mentally drained. Stop, get up, go for a walk, or make yourself a cup of tea, or do some leg lifts and stretches at your desk, or run an errand… take a break. Then come back fresh and focus on high impact action.
I just shared two of my self-sabotaging phrases which are “I have to” and “I’m so overwhelmed”.
In the comments below share one of your self-sabotaging phrases and your flip for it. What are you going to flip it to starting RIGHT now?
Love & Success,
Heidi and Your Marketing Team
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I sabatoge my self by saying, I’m stressed. I dont have enough help (none actually). the best one…Why am I doing this, I thought it would be fun!?
my flip is, I’m lucky. Relax, Go for a walk. Drink a shot of tequilas..(joke)
Haha! Those all sound like great ideas, Kathleen 🙂
Thank you – I love this! Just reading the flip, “I choose to…”, made me feel more relaxed and in control of my day. Will be implementing this flip right now today .
You’re welcome, Kerry. That’s what I like to hear! I’m glad you can feel more relaxed and in control.
Good points which I am sharing with my team at MMMTravel! Thanks for all that you share with us!
Hi Jane! You are very welcome! 🙂